Currently Watching Poster Boy By Matt Newton see related

Never so close, never so alone...

There are some days in life when I just feel so happy to be alive and just want to hug every single person around me, even if I don't know them.

Then there are days in life where I just want to see my gay family and tell them all how much I love them and how sad I am going to be next year when we are all split apart.

Then there are days when I really hate people and just want to turn my phone off and tell the world to leave me the f alone. But I don't...

I don't because I always wonder, will he call...

He who when I think about him I want to just melt away,

He who when I am in his arms just want to lay there forever,

He who when I am around him I just don't care about the world anymore.

But it is also he who confuses my life and causes it to become split between my best friend and him.

Why do I want to be so close to someone, but at the same time I just want to be so alone???

Thanksgiving...

So the past month or so has been interesting...

My mom has done nothing but be the crazy bitch she always is,

My dad has become a more understanding person,

I have received more AMAZING chances than ever in my life, and had to turn most of them down due to my 'rents,

My best friend seems to be happy, and I relly hope they are,

I have had a chance to see my best friend more,

Something that I looked to as an example seems to have failed,

Life seems to get depressing more and more and I find it hard sometimes to see the positive in it,

But then I think of all the amazing people out there they I have met and have yet to met and I realize why I am still here,

I love you all, happy Thanksgiving.

Tatters

Past to present...

If two people from a life you contuine to try and forget make contact with you or your family does it mean fate wants you to try and re-connect??

If you family doesn't tell you that they have already made contact does that make the untrustworthy??

I don't understand

Tatters

Things I really should do but don't want to...

I am going to make a list of the things I should be doing right now but really really don't want to be...

1. Do all the homework from last week, seeing as I missed everyday except for Friday...
2. Doing friday's homework as well
3. Trying to find a new job, while still managing to maintain my marketing intership...so pretty much trying to get transfered
4. Cleaning my car
5. Cleaning my kitchen
6. Sleeping
7. Washing my clothes
8. Working on my college shit to make sure it is done and out of the way
9. Trying to remeber what I have to do tomorrow
10. Oh yeah and getting my homework done

Love you all...I need to get started

Tatters

This goes out to few and many...

It has come to my attention that there a few and many people in this world that act in a manner which I don't understand...and maybe that's because I am not meant to

People seem to be one of two ways, two faced or faceless.  Why??

This applies in my life it seems in both personal and professional...

Do people find me to be rude, obnoxious, or just flat out weird???

If so why don't people say something??

Or in a professional manner, do I seem to be controlling, intimadating, and a flat out bitch???

If so why don't people say something??

I realize that on some level everyone is different, but that is what makes people, people.

I am here to be me, those who don't like it need to leave.

Those who don't care, I am glad your here.

Those who support me, I love you for it.

I am tired of the two faced and faceless lies in my life,

It is time for change

Later,

Tatters